If you don't have 16-foot ceilings, or if you still retain a sliver of human dignity and haven't converted your entire living room into a high-altitude tactical obstacle course... this is the Mini-Monolith. It's 8 feet of solid, stud-anchored engineering designed to keep your chaos gremlin off the kitchen counter without requiring a construction permit.

What’s Inside the Manual:

• The Master Supply List: No more aimless wandering through hardware store aisles. We’ve listed every bolt, bracket, and piece of timber required to keep your beasts airborne and your drywall intact.

• The 8-Foot Tree Blueprint: Detailed instructions on how to engineer a vertical summit that even a 18-pound beast with one brain cell can’t knock over.

• Structural Secrets: The Chief Tree Engineer’s tips on weight distribution, anchoring, and ensuring the tree survives a tactical strike from an apex predator.

• The Staff Survival Guide: Hard-won advice on how to build a 16-foot monument while maintaining your sanity.

Look, I get it. Not everyone wants to turn their living room into a 16-foot structural liability. Some of you actually like your crown molding and don't want to see a pair of beady eyes staring down at you from the stratosphere while you eat your cereal.

The Chaos Gremlin Lite is the diet version of our flagship blueprint. It’s designed for standard ceilings, reasonable budgets, and owners whose blood pressure can't handle watching a their cat perform a squirrel-impression 16 feet in the air.

What’s Inside:

• The Supply List: Everything you need for an 8-foot build—and no scaffolding required. No more aimless wandering through hardware store aisles. We’ve listed every bolt, bracket, and piece of timber required to keep your beasts airborne and your drywall intact.

• The Cat Wall Blueprint: Detailed instructions to build a sturdy, vertical stage that can still handle a tactical strike from a Chaos Gremlin, just with less altitude.

• The Five-Shelf System: Blueprints for five strategic platforms that will serve as reasonably sized launch pads for your living room tiger.

• Staff Training:Hard-won advice on how to build a cat wall and maintain your sanity.

This is the official guide to building your own 16-foot cat wall. It is for the ambitious pet parent who has accepted that their home actually belongs to their cats. The wall is designed to withstand 18-pound meat-heads launching themselves at terminal velocity and stone-cold predators who think they’re squirrels.

What’s Inside the Manual:

• The Master Supply List: No more aimless wandering through hardware store aisles. We’ve listed every bolt, bracket, and piece of timber required to keep your beasts airborne and your drywall intact.

• The 16-Foot Tree Blueprint: Detailed instructions on how to engineer a vertical summit that even a 18-pound beast with one brain cell can’t knock over.

• The Five-Shelf System: Blueprints for the five strategic platforms that serve as the launching pads for your chaos gremlin’s 3am zoomies (or, if you’re lucky, a nap spot).

• Structural Secrets: The Chief Tree Engineer’s tips on weight distribution, anchoring, and ensuring the tree survives a tactical strike from an apex predator.

• The Staff Survival Guide: Hard-won advice on how to build a 16-foot monument while maintaining your sanity.

This is the official guide to building your own 16-foot cat tree. It is for the pet parent who is not ready to give their entire living room to vertical madness, but is ready to give their house lions something to climb and scratch (that isn’t your couch).

What’s Inside the Manual:

• The Master Supply List: No more aimless wandering through hardware store aisles. We’ve listed every bolt, bracket, and piece of timber required to keep your beasts airborne and your drywall intact.

• The 16-Foot Tree Blueprint: Detailed instructions on how to engineer a vertical summit that even a 18-pound beast with one brain cell can’t knock over.

• Structural Secrets: The Chief Tree Engineer’s tips on weight distribution, anchoring, and ensuring the tree survives a tactical strike from an apex predator.

• The Staff Survival Guide: Hard-won advice on how to build a 16-foot monument while maintaining your sanity.